Ever feel like you're just not worth the pollution expelled by gaseous bovines? Ever feel as out-of-place as a shot of scotch at an AA meeting? Ever feel as useful as that bit of toilet paper stuck to some guy's shoe?
...yeah, that's about where I stand right about now.
I just don't belong,
I'm outta my place.
My meaning is empty,
I'm losing the race.
I forgot a friend's birthday last week. Almost forgot my mom's too. I'm such a self-absorbed fool sometimes.
I'm drifting away,
I'm falling apart.
There's no one to blame,
I'm empty at heart.
And I know I'm just getting left behind again. I always do. I should just stop playing. There's just too much, and I can't get it all done in time, I know I can't. I don't have the time, the energy, or the skill. I'm not good enough, I'm not qualified enough, I'm not ready enough. Just like always, I'll get a nice pat on the head and be sent away by the big kids to play with the babies in the corner. It's always the same. Every single time. Every single fing time.
It's no one's fault but my own. I don't blame anyone else. Just me. And sometimes, I wonder why I even try anymore.
I'm running on empty,
There's nothing much left.
Just waiting in shadows,
And dreaming of death.
Of course, it's never that easy. Never.
1 comment:
Tal, I forgot about YOUR birthday. I think I know what month your brother's birthday is, but I'm not quite certain. And his girlfriend? I don't don't even know which half of the year she falls in! Blogtember? Sure, everyone ever born is 5,000,000 times more thoughtful than I am, but still . . . Hey, look, Cheeze-its.
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