Haven't posted in a while.
Dunno what's wrong.
Not feeling myself lately.
Not feeling up to anything.
Not feeling much at all.
Tired.
Alone.
Empty.
Feels so empty here.
I'm not. I know.
But caught myself indulging in the solitude again.
The melancholy angst.
A drop of blood in a crystal glass of pure water.
Swallowed in a flash by the clear void of liquid light.
But which am I: the blood, or water?
Friday, September 29, 2006
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Beyond Lost
Totally, utterly, completely lost - heart, mind, and soul.
Lost without reservation, without care, without the heartache of the past weighing me down, dragging me into the deep dark morass of regret and fear.
Throwing hesitation to the wind with careful deliberation, with studied intent, knowing and remembering and ridding myself of the burden of self-inflicted loathing and despair.
The past will not hold me, will not bind me - my heart shall not be captive to fear and longing and doubt.
Free. To soar the skies. To gaze down upon the clouds. To dance among the stars. Cast off the chains. Free.
To settle upon another perch. To sit upon another sill. To find a home of such warmth and comfort, of such fulfillment and love, that never again shall it want for more.
Lost. Beyond lost. Home.
Lost without reservation, without care, without the heartache of the past weighing me down, dragging me into the deep dark morass of regret and fear.
Throwing hesitation to the wind with careful deliberation, with studied intent, knowing and remembering and ridding myself of the burden of self-inflicted loathing and despair.
The past will not hold me, will not bind me - my heart shall not be captive to fear and longing and doubt.
Free. To soar the skies. To gaze down upon the clouds. To dance among the stars. Cast off the chains. Free.
To settle upon another perch. To sit upon another sill. To find a home of such warmth and comfort, of such fulfillment and love, that never again shall it want for more.
Lost. Beyond lost. Home.